Monday, 3 October 2011

Does my 'BUT' look too big?

I have been listening to some recordings from Topher Morrison, one of my favourite coaches and a colleague at APCTC.

He talks about the art of negotiation using NLP tools and reminded me about using the word BUT.

It took me a long while but now I rarely use the word but unless it refers to something I might be saying eg

I would love to go out in the sunshine but I have too much work

After much practice I now replace it with the word AND as much as I can because BUT just negates everything someone has just said to you! The word HOWEVER sort of does too but it not quite so obvious. So for example if a person is expressing an opinion you disagree with, the word AND will build bridges whilst allowing you to still add your opinion.

try it and see the difference when communicating....

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